You a fan of mythology at all? If so, you might enjoy the clip going around of a wild boar, bursting forth from the froth of the sea, as though dispatched by Artemis herself, to turn a once-tranquil Polish beach into its own personal Calydon — meaning it runs around and knocks the hell out of everyone in its path. It’s technically awful and actually awesome. Maybe bookmark this one the next time you want to complain about the horseflies at Crane.
THE WALKING DUH
Pokemon Go! may have people wandering into traffic, crashing into police cars, and throwing themselves into fake gym regimens, but it’s also cleaning up the streets. This past week, a Milford, Mich., man with an outstanding warrant (and an outstanding collection) blithely tracked his Pokemon prey right onto the lawn of the local police department — where he was observed being a weird person in pajamas circling the flagpole, and arrested for failing to appear at a past sentencing. Kind of makes you wonder why the government just doesn’t develop a Pokemon style app for law enforcement. Oh wait.
The Internet gasped with delight when it was revealed that longtime cartoon moose antagonist and potential first lady Melania Trump recited a speech at this week’s Republican National Convention that pilfered whole passages from a 2008 address by the current first lady. Asked for comment, sources within the Trump campaign admitted they momentarily forgot who had the best words.
Taylor Swift and Kanye West’s breathtakingly obnoxious tango crossed the ballroom of public consciousness yet again this week, as Kim Kardashian posted a furtively recorded video to Instagram that appears to show West on the phone with Swift, getting the go-ahead on the racy Taylor-relevant lyrics he’d written for his track, “Famous” — and thereby contradicting Swift’s earlier claim that she never gave approval. Did Kanye break wiretapping laws? Was Taylor’s public fit over the track just a performance? And most importantly, where is that wild boar when we need it?
MICHAEL ANDOR BRODEURMichael Andor Brodeur can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Follow him on Twitter @MBrodeur.