I like the way Nikki in “Wicked Single” says that girls should keep their mouths shut when watching a game with guys. She’s right. Look, if you want guys to like you, you’ve got to be able to sit still, chest forward, and look pretty. And by pretty, I mean having a peanut-butter-colored tan, incandescent hair, and shaved eyebrows that leave a light fossil imprint on the lower forehead.
Nikki is the Snooki figure on VH1’s new “Jersey Shore”-like reality show, which premieres on Sunday at 11 p.m (also showing on MTV at the same time). She is the breakout character, and I, for one, am hoping that when “Wicked Single” hits it big, and becomes the next major TV sensation, Nikki will make it onto the talk-show circuit and into the publishing world. Maybe Rutgers University will pay her $32,000 to speak, just as they did Snooki in 2011. Maybe, if we’re lucky, some uber-creative reality producer will give us “Snooki ’n’ Nikki: Accent on Fun.”