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What’s their line: Meet the comedians

Anya Garrett

Dan Wilbur

  • Age: 26

  • Hometown: Cleveland (now, Brooklyn, N.Y.)

  • How I pay the rent: I used to work in a bookstore and write books, but now I just evade my landlord until I land a super-high-paying gig called an “industrial,” where I star in a video teaching kids how to not get injured in woodshop.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: Over eight years

  • My best payday as a comic was: $75 for a one-nighter in Vermont.

  • Best one-liner: Goethe called architecture “frozen music,” and I bet if he saw a Frank Gehry building, he’d be like, “This one is Ke$ha’s fault.”


Christina Watka

Shaun Bedgood

  • Age: “Between 21 and 35 years old”

  • Hometown: Dorchester (by way of
    Alabama)

  • How I pay the rent: I am a campus
    police officer.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: Just under nine years

  • My best payday as a comic was: I made about $550 for a 20-minute set at a private gig in Charleroi, Pa.

  • Best one-liner: My job is pretty tough; I have to put on a police uniform every day. That’s right, I’m a stripper.

Anya Garrett

Selena Coppock

  • Age: 33

  • Hometown: Weston

  • How I pay the rent: I’m a book editor and book author. My first book, “The New Rules for Blondes,” came out in May.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: Technically nine years, but I’ve only been really focused on it for about six years.

  • My best payday as a comic was: A few hundred dollars when I co-headlined Mottley’s — rest in peace — with Leah Dubie. We did a Weston vs. Wayland-themed show.

  • Best one-liner: I like my coffee like I like my men: bitter and incapable of experiencing human emotion.

Bill Marshall

Matt Donaher

  • Age: 28

  • Hometown: Hudson, N.H.

  • How I pay the rent: Usually with a check.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: 4½ years

  • My best payday as a comic was: One time during my act a man fell out of his chair, and that was worth way more to me than anything I’ve been paid because I did not like that guy.

  • Best one-liner: I used to think I really liked trail mix. Turns out, I just like M&Ms that play hard to get.

Precious Chong

  • Age: 40-ish

  • Hometown: Toronto

  • How I pay the rent: I walk on stilts.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: Three years

  • My best payday as a comic was: I performed stand-up naked at a nudist resort for 50 bucks, a free pen, and a memory that will last forever.

  • Best one-liner: When my dad was in jail, he used to try and set me up with some of his inmates.

Mallorie Ekstrom

Taylor Connelly

  • Age: 27

  • Hometown: Peabody

  • How I pay the rent: Bartending, waiting tables, gigs.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: Nine years

  • My best payday as a comic was: $150

  • Best one-liner: I used to think gay people came from closets.

Kevin Hall

  • Age: 23

  • Hometown: Union, N.J.

  • How I pay the rent: I’m a manager at Scotty’s Comedy Cove in Springfield, N.J., and a teaching assistant, but my mom pays the rent.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: 3½ years

  • My best payday as a comic was: $100

  • Best one-liner: I think the worst time to start the wave is during a fund-raiser for tsunami awareness.

Anya Garrett

Leah Dubie

  • Age: 37

  • Hometown: Wayland

  • How I pay the rent: Some stand-up, some comedy writing, lots of being a television producer.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: About 10 years

  • My best payday as a comic was: I used to produce shows up and down the Northeast, and the most I made on one show was $7,000. I thought I was rich and could retire.

  • Best one-liner: Saying you only smoke when you drink is like saying you only use heroin when you’re in the neighborhood.

Brian Moe

Christine An

  • Age: 24

  • Hometown: Sugar Hill, Ga.

  • How I pay the rent: Writing case studies at the Harvard Business School.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: Two to three years

  • My best payday as a comic was: Five Hamiltons, but I think laughter, even the quiet kind, is often its own reward.

  • Best one-liner: Some people like to run the bathroom faucet to mask the sound of urination, but why waste water when you can just scream?

Dan Crohn

  • Age: 36

  • Hometown: Brookline

  • How I pay the rent: Comedy-drink tickets

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: 10 years

  • Best payday as a comic was: Any gig that includes free food.

  • Best one-liner: I’m shy. I get Hooters takeout.

Chris “Jonesy” Jones

  • Age: 30s

  • Hometown: Haverhill

  • How I pay the rent: Commercial actor and comedian

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: 10 years

  • My best payday as a comic was: $1,500

  • Best one-liner: Hold the limo, I gotta gloss my tats.

Andre H. Arruda

  • Age: 30

  • Hometown: Kitchener-Waterloo,

  • Ontario (now, Toronto)

  • How I pay the rent: With my soul! My landlord isn’t evil or anything. She just really likes classic rhythm and blues fused with gospel. And I do a pretty good Ray Charles.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for:

  • 0 [years]. I’ve been doing sitdown for about 12.

  • My best payday as a comic was: As a Canadian, I’m too polite to tell you. Let’s just say I’m very grateful for my country’s free health care.

  • Best one-liner: I don’t want you to feel sorry for me but if you do, I like [whatever brand-name beer that’s sponsoring the Boston Comedy Festival].

Luke Fontana

Mark Normand

  • Age: 30

  • Hometown: New Orleans

  • How I pay the rent: I pay the rent with yuk ’em ups. Mostly college gigs and club dates.

  • I’ve been doing stand-up for: Seven years and change

  • My best payday as a comic was: I got three grand once to roast a hedge-fund company for 10 minutes.

  • Best one-liner: You never see a church with free Wi-Fi, probably because no church wants to compete with an invisible power that actually works.

Steph Hiltz can be reached at stephanie.hiltz@globe.com.
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