Q. Hi Meredith. I’ve been seeing a woman for a few months and have felt very conflicted about how close she is to her family. From a removed standpoint I find this odd, given I’ve been actively seeking a smart, pretty woman who has strong family ties. She is all of these things. However, how close is too close?
Warning bells first started chiming when I’d find her talking/texting with her mother, father, brother, and sister on a rotating basis, numerous times, while on dates. When we took a road trip this past summer — our first serious outing as a couple — we spent an entire day with her younger brother and his friends. I knew the brother lived in the area and that we would see him, but I wasn’t aware that we would share almost the entirety of the trip with him. That night I had to make clear to her that I wanted to spend time with her alone during the day. She obliged, but if I hadn’t brought it up, the second day would’ve been a repeat of the first. Also during the trip, I found it odd how the brother never struck up a direct conversation with me, despite my overtures.