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The Boston Globe

Magazine

Miss Conduct

Digging up family dirt

Plus, a friend more into a new guy than your shared project, and whether one can drink from a bowl in a restaurant.

My father learned when he was a child that the man he thought was his father wasn’t. After his biological father won a prestigious horse racing event in the 1950s, everyone in my father’s small Ohio town was talking, and eventually an older boy told my father that this man was his “real” father. I have researched my biological grandfather and sometimes thought I’d like to contact his family — especially now, because I think my father might be in the early stages of Alzheimer’s, which no one else in my family has. However, I don’t want to cause people any hurt or confusion. What do you think?

S.B. / Somerville

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