The nightmare long before Christmas
There was no mistaking it: The house on Hillside Avenue was getting its Christmas on. In the first week of November. I can’t take this, people. I like my Halloweens in October, my Thanksgivings in November, my Christmases in December. I want to savor each holiday. I need my anxieties evenly spaced. Instead, I’m trapped in seasonal Turducken, three holidays in one.