In the months before his death from a heroin overdose, Logan, a student at UMass Amherst, struggled both with his substance abuse and his decision to become a police informant after he was caught selling drugs in his dorm room.
Text messages to friends and acquaintances, obtained by the Boston Globe, reveal some of his thoughts as he fought to get clean and to maintain his relationships with friends, some of them angry that he led police to another classmate who was selling drugs.
Logan’s parents did not know that he was using heroin until the day he overdosed.
Explicit language has been removed from some of these entries, as have the names of Logan’s contacts. To protect his family’s privacy, the Globe is only using his middle name.
By late 2012, Logan had built a reputation in some quarters as a person with access to potent drugs. In the exchange below, he traded messages with a person he had met a week earlier, and who was looking for some of the same drugs she had gotten from him before.
Around the same time, Logan was struggling with addiction. He asked a friend — with whom he would regularly discuss his addiction — to help him find more heroin.
Logan would soon be busted selling Molly, a club drug, and LSD. He would ultimately lead police to a friend who also sold drugs. While that friend was arrested and suspended from school, Logan remained at UMass.
In messages exchanged with another friend, Logan defended his decision become a confidential informant.
[Expletive] man, I can't say I fully agree but I'm glad you told me the truth. So does that mean you're not in trouble at all? No fines, suspension from school, or anything like that
In January, Logan happily announced, in a text to the friend he previously had asked for a connection, that police had returned his money.
Logan continued to struggle with drugs, writing to the same friend about his fear that he had injured himself with an injection.
He and the friend continued to discuss his misgivings about drug use as the days went on. Logan considered leaving school and entering rehab.
Amid his battle with addiction, Logan also found himself facing hostility from others who believed he should not have become a confidential informant to get himself out of trouble.
I would have kept my mouth shut and called a lawyer like anyone with half a brain would do
Texting with a friend, Logan described the difficulties he had encountered trying to wean himself off of heroin. Some of his texts suggest that he had obtained a supply of the treatment drug suboxone.
On the day that he died, Logan texted the person believed to be his dealer, looking to quickly pick up some drugs.
Referring to the drug as “tropicana,” Logan’s suspected dealer checked in after he made the delivery. Logan would never respond, though his mother would write in weeks later to express her disdain for the person she blamed for her son’s death.
How much tropicana did u drink