Our home is full of music. This is mainly because of a discovery I made long ago: Where nagging fails, singing succeeds.
For example, Wagner’s “Ride of the Valkyries” (a.k.a. “Kill the Wabbit”) makes a perfectly thrilling musical vessel for a request like “Do the dish-es/do the dish-es/do the DISH-es/do-them-right-now!” And pretty much any pop hit can be retooled into an irresistibly irritating spur to action, from Roy Orbison’s plaintive “Only the Laundry” to Britney Spears’s “Oops, He Did It Again” — a rousing diaper-changing anthem if ever there was one.
If you don’t quite fancy yourself the Bernie Taupin of household chore delegation, fear not. A new app called Ditty has brought the power of retrofit lyricism to the masses, and the possibilities are limited only by your imagination/to-do list.
Simply select a song from Ditty’s currently modest catalog (most of the good ones will run you 99 cents), type a short message in the provided field, and marvel as Ditty instantly combines them to compose a tiny little megahit about stopping by the dry cleaners and/or picking up a carton of milk.
Now you can convey that you’re “all out of beer” via Sia’s hit “Chandelier,” or class up a mundane shortage of T.P. through the majesty of Verdi’s “La donna è mobile.” The entertainment potential of Ditty (especially for the sender) is endless — until, that is, they add “Let It Go” to the list, at which point I’m deleting. There are limits to my cruelty.
An example of a video created with Ditty: