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Tastes like friendzone: Polar Seltzer finally delivers a relatable Valentine’s Day flavor

Polar Seltzer is releasing two new flavors in time for Valentine’s day: Red Hearts and Black Hearts.
Polar Seltzer is releasing two new flavors in time for Valentine's day: Red Hearts and Black Hearts. (Eva Maldonado)

Mmm, tastes like. . . heartbreak?

The Worcester-based Polar Seltzer company has done it again, releasing two new limited-edition flavors just in time for Valentine’s Day — this time, with shareable labels that cater to those who love, and loathe, the day of romance.

“Love it? Or hate it? You certainly can’t escape it,” company officials wrote in a heart-sticker-laden missive sent to the Globe.

The two drinks are differentiated by the labels: Happy red for those who love love — including Sweetheart-style messages like “You Quench My Thirst” and “Be Mine” — and emo black labels with messages like “Friendzone” and “I’d Rather Drink Alone" (for those who might have been rejected one too many times).


The brand is encouraging seltzer-drinkers to share the bottles with those they love — or don’t.

Since there’s no obvious description of these new flavor profiles, a few Globe journalists gave the new fizzy drinks a try. The consensus: The red label has more a citrusy grapefruit taste, while the black label has more of a robust melon flavor. (A nonscientific poll determined that the black label seltzer was the clear winner in a taste test.)

However, the two flavors do have actual names, according to a company representative: “Red Hearts Passionfruit & loving peach,” and “Black Hearts blackbury & champain.” (Of course, the “passion” and “loving” was emphasized by the company for the red label drink, while “bury” and “pain” were noted for the black label.)

The flavors will be in stores until Valentine’s Day, or while supplies last.

Polar Seltzer’s limited-edition lines tend to get people to their grocery stores in droves. The quest to snag onetime flavors produced by Polar Seltzer began in March 2016, when the company released its limited-edition Unicorn Kisses flavor. Only 5,000 cases of the beverage were released leading up to April 1, or April Fools’ Day, and as supplies dwindled, people started selling the drinks online for upward of $100.


The popularity of the drinks also seems to fall in line with a recent spike in seltzer’s popularity. Approximately 168,000 million gallons of seltzer are consumed annually, according to a 2016 Globe report. That same report said the Nielsen research group tracked a 21.6 percent spike in seltzer purchases in 2015.

Steve Annear of the Globe staff contributed to this report.