Mitt Romney tells David Letterman Top 10 things he would say: ‘It’s a hairpiece’

Mitt Romney sought to lighten his personal image with a stop at the “Late Show with David Letterman,” but the Republican presidential candidate still couldn’t avoid the needle from his comedic host.

“How’d you do on the back nine?” Letterman joked after Romney traded the suit in which he arrived at the Ed Sullivan Theater for a blue blazer, patterned button-down shirt, khaki pants - and no tie.

But Romney didn’t falter and instead plowed through the CBS-TV program’s nightly “Top Ten” list.

Last night’s edition?

“Top Ten Things Mitt Romney Would Like To Say To The American People.”

The former Massachusetts governor personally read them off:


No. 10: “Isn’t it time for a president who looks like a 1970s game show host?”

No 9: “What’s up, gangstas - it’s the M-I-Double-Tizzle.”

No. 8: “ have no proof, but I have a feeling Canada is planning something.”

No. 7: “Actually, I’m only here to meet Tom Cruise.”

No. 6: “Live from New York, it’s Saturday night!!!

No. 5: “My new cologne is now available at Macy’s. It’s ‘Mitt-stified.’”

No. 4: “I just used all my campaign money to buy a zoo with Matt Damon.”

No. 3: “I can do a lot, but even I can’t fix the Indianapolis Colts.” (Letterman is a native of Indiana, the home state of the New England Patriots’ longtime-but-now-hardluck football rivals.)

No. 2: “Newt Gingrich? Really?”

No. 1: “It’s a hairpiece.”

The appearance, the second Top Ten reading by Romney this year, came amid a media blitz of New York City that included interviews with Charlie Rose and Bill O’Reilly.

In February, Romney appeared on Letterman’s show to name the “Top Ten Things You Don’t Know About Mitt Romney.”

Glen Johnson can be reached at johnson@globe.com. Follow him on Twitter @globeglen.